Are Traditional Dating Rules Still Advisable?
What are those things your mama or grandma told you about dating? For me, the list is endless but I will mention a few – they were; don’t chase a man, don’t beg a man to love you, remain pure for your husband (virginity), don’t put your eggs in one basket and so on…
In the traditional rules of dating, men are said to always be the hunters, they do the chase while the ladies play hard to get. They make all the moves, while she enjoys the rendezvous. They are to call first, text first, express their feelings first, show more serious level of commitment and so on.
Do all these rules still apply? As a lady, should you abide by this rule or go the conventional way? A lot of people ask questions like: ‘should I call him first?’, ‘should I text him first?’, ‘should I make the moves first?’. This is going the conventional way, nowadays, ladies now ask men out, make the first moves and organise dates.
So in answering the question if you should abide by the traditional dating rules, I will say yes and no, and this is why.
Abiding by traditional dating rules can help a lot in saving you from heartbreaks and emotional trauma. You met him maybe planned or unexpected, you had a great time talking and laughing, exchanged contacts, and in your head you are already thinking you found a boyfriend, but then he never calls or keep in touch afterwards.
Few days pass and you are very worried he hasn’t contacted you yet, then you feel strongly to contact him, trying to convince yourself maybe he didn’t contact you because he’s phone went blind, he’s seriously ill or worst still kidnapped – you know non of this is true, you are just trying to find an excuse.
You put a call through and he doesn’t answer it. So you think I will ring once more and that’s it. You already gave him two missed calls by now. Oh, maybe he doesn’t know I am the one, so you send a text, no reply,then you send another saying you just want to know if he’s fine. Two missed calls and two messages unreplied, this will definitely leave you miserable than worried.
Sometimes, the reverse maybe the case. Maybe he did answer the call and acted politely. But each time you find you are always the one who initiates the contact first. You act sweet and nice, hoping he would see this side of you. Just cut the chase and walk away with the little dignity you still have left.
Well on the other hand, if you are the conventional type of lady, then no worries. You should be used to chasing men, catching some and loosing some. Some men do not see any problem in being chased by a lady, while for some it’s a major turnoff. Even if you are a conventional lady, always know where to draw the curtains and not loose your sanity.
Lastly, if you reach out to a person and they do not reply you, just take it as a sign they probably do not want anything to do with you. Don’t loose sleep trying to analyse what you did wrong or how to get them to be close to you – it’s never worth it. There is someone out there who will appreciate you and never take you for granted.